Author Archive
Stories written by Joan Florek Schottenfeld

As You Like It: Once Upon a Time

I’m an incurable romantic. I’m a sap for mushy movies, happy endings, couples persevering against all odds. I savor transformations of ugly ducklings and Cinderellas. I want to believe that there is a partner for everyone because it would make me too sad to think that there wasn’t. That’s why despite the fact that it […]

As You Like It: To Shop Should Be Human

I love to shop. I always have. I can remember spending my time in a candy store deciding just where to spend my nickel. I remember haunting the toy store across the street from where we lived in Brooklyn, Fain’s Toys. It was my idea of kid heaven, living across the street from a toy […]

As You Like It: Counting the Days

It had been a wonderful vacation because both my girls were in town for 12 days. It’s funny how parents of older children measure their kids’ at-home times. I didn’t realize it until my friend Peg told me that she had a great vacation because her daughter had come home for 11 days. Almost like […]

As You Like It: 30 Years

My baby is about to turn 30 next week. How is it possible that my little bright eyes has been in my life for 30 years? No one ever warns you how quickly child-years race by. Or maybe they do, but you’re not really listening until suddenly, you are the parent of a child who […]

As You Like It: Giving Thanks

I used to write a column each year before Thanksgiving, thanking all the people who made my life joyful. I haven’t done it in years. It’s not that I have no one to thank; it’s just that I’m not as good as I used to be about keeping on top of the holidays. When I […]

As You Like It: Big Rocks and Letting Go

I just finished Billy Crystal’s new book, Still Foolin’ ’Em: Where I’ve Been, Where I’m Going, and Where the Hell Are My Keys? Crystal writes about dealing gracefully with being 65. He may be a guy and famous, I may be a woman and definitely not famous, but there were times when I thought the […]

As You Like It: Take My Upgrade

Glancing at my cell phone, I noticed a tiny number attached to one of my application icons. As usual, something needed updating. If it’s an app that I’ve added, it’s not a big deal. I click on the icon, agree to everything they ask of me, including seven years of indentured servitude, and voila! I’m […]

As You Like It: Weighty Matters

Yesterday a lady in the supermarket snack aisle remarked: “Did you ever notice that they put the Oreos right next to the rice cakes?” Startled, I looked around and realized that she was right. Directly in front of the rice cakes was a cardboard display stacked with double stuff Oreos. “Yes, but we will prevail,” […]

As You Like It: Do you have an Advil?

You wouldn’t think that that is the question I’m asked most by coworkers, friends and family, but I think it is. Followed by, “Do you have a tissue, hand cream, safety pin, a pen or a mirror?” And the answer to all those questions is, “But of course I do!” And why am I always […]

As You Like It: That Certain Glow

Vanity of vanities … all is vanity. Ecclesiastes had a pretty good take on the human race. Most of us are more concerned about the way we look than about the way we are. Yes, we would all like to think that the first thing we think about in the morning is how we can […]

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